Who’s in Charge?

So, over here God is a man and so is the head of the household.

Last week, we had exams and I happened to be invigiliating (read supervising) and I learned that the man is the head of the household. It’s not a matter for debate, it’s an answer to an exam question.

Mama carries the water, goes to the market, possibly works there too, does the cooking and cleaning (along with the children). And daddy is the head of the household.

Which brings me to another point. I am old here. Not once or even twice, it has been remarked that I’m pretty much past my use by date. If I don’t start churning out those babies, not only will I not have respect in the community but I will have no-one to support me in my old age.

And you know, that’s how it is here. Women do have babies and men are the head of the household. It’s not that women aren’t respected. They are – very much so. These are just the roles that still exist in Africa.

I can’t say if it works or not. In Australia 50% of marriages break up. In Ireland we only got divorce but let’s face it, there were a LOT of separations before that happened. Who knows what makes a family stay together. So I can’t say that our way is better. It certainly seems like there's a much greater sense of community. Neighbours help each other, families eat and pray together and people talk to each other. It’s just a shame that in a country where family and community are so important, many children lose their parents to AIDS.